Deranged Designer Villain
Then: Jacobim Mugatu (Will Ferrell), an early adopter of platinum hair and man buns. He pioneered the seminal Derelicte collection and invented the piano key necktie.
Now: Alexanya Atoz (Kristen Wiig), an over-Botoxed Italian fashion magnate who speaks with an indiscernible accent
Derek Crush
Then: Journalist Matilda Jeffries (Christine Taylor, who is Stiller’s real-life wife)
Now: Valentina Valencia (Cruz), Interpol special fashion agent with a shadowy past
Significant Look
Then: Blue Steel, a look so fierce it stopped a throwing star in midair and saved the life of the Malaysian prime minister
Now: AcquaFina, a deviation from Blue Steel with a subtle eyebrow tilt
Zoolander’s Commercial Spot
Then: The Aveda “merman” commercial (“Moisture is the essence of wetness, and wetness is the essence of beauty”) that horrified Derek’s father (Jon Voight).
Now: The aforementioned AcquaFina spot, which (no spoilers) again transforms Derek’s bottom half. (It also features cameos from almost every current supermodel.)
Notable Hansel Orgy
Then: Derek, Matilda, and a colorful supporting cast engaged in an herbal-infused night to remember. As Derek recalled of Matilda: “There was a moment last night, when she was sandwiched between the two Finnish dwarves and the Maori tribesmen, where I thought, Wow, I could really spend the rest of my life with this woman.”
Now: Hansel has a 10-way with a former teen pop star, a veteran television actor, and at least one farm animal.
Trusty Assistant
Then: Mugatu’s latte-furnishing plebe, Todd
Now: VIP, rhymes with pip (Fred Armisen’s face CGI-ed on a tween’s body to eerie perfection), an iPad-toting social media coordinator for up-and-coming hipster designer Don Atari (Kyle Mooney)
Tech Breakthrough
Then: Derek’s miniature flip phone
Now: Instagram (whose filters are carefully considered even as a major pop star takes a death selfie)
Social Scourge
Then: Billy Zane
Now: Hipsters who run Rome’s Palazzo di Caca, which is constructed entirely of biodegradable human waste, replete with “farm-to-table WiFi”
Delicious Cameos
Then: Vince Vaughn, Paris Hilton, Winona Ryder, David Duchovny, and the late, great David Bowie
Now: Yes, Justin Bieber appears in the trailer. As for the rest? Just you wait . . .
Derek Zoolander takes us inside his really, really ridiculously good-looking apartment:
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